Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming
does anyone on this godforsaken website ever think before they speak
That comment is a sapiosexual Dom engaging in intellectual shame play
my fave greek history story to tell is that of agnodice. like she noticed that women were dying a lot during childbirth so she went to egypt to study medicine in alexandria and was really fucking good but b/c it was illegal for women to be doctors in athens she had to pretend to be a man. and then the other doctors noticed that she was 10x better than them and accused her of seducing and sleeping with the women patients. like they brought her to court for this. and she just looked at them and these charges and stripped in front of everyone like “yeah. im not fucking your wives” and then they got so mad that a woman was better at their jobs then them that they tried to execute her but all her patients came to court and were like “are you fucking serious? she is the reason you have living children and a wife.” so they were shamed into changing the law and that is how women were given the right to practice medicine in athens
Yeah, this isn’t some Greek myth story about a hero or demigod or something, Agnodice was a real person who actually did this.
I think it’s important to understand that, with BPD (and other disorders that coincide with abuse- I’m discussing BPD because I have personal experience with that), many symptoms are survival mechanisms. They all have a specific function to protect the individual.
We become hyperaware of other’s emotions and hypersensitive towards their anger (to the point of reading neutrality as anger) and criticism largely to anticipate potential abuse.
We experience emotional amnesia, the rapid disintegration of our memories (as a friend of mine once said, “everything up until today is fuzzy”), and dissociation to prevent ourselves from being frozen in place by trauma (because survival requires we move on).
We learn how to cope via behaviors like substance abuse, even though they are ultimately to our detriment, because they temporarily ease the suffering and prolong our will to live.
Most studies indicate about 75% of people with BPD ere a used as children. This number only reflects the amount of people whose trauma was believed and validated by a “professional”, the amount of people who could reliably recount their trauma (and like I mentioned, repression is a huge issue for many of us), and the amount of people who were abused during an arbitrarily defined window of childhood (often prior to adolescence, even though an individual’s developmental stage extends into their early twenties). We are, quite literally, hardwired to survive abuse.
FYI to go on to develop trauma related disorders (i.e PTSD,dissociative disorders, certain personality disorders) you don’t have to experience a huge traumatic experience event like assault or extreme abuse or whatever yall think it can be brought on by traumatic grief, loss, or just a predisposed hypersensitivity to adverse experiences or mistreatment . Stop acting like you have to go through Extreme Trauma Being Killed And Dying Being Blown Up and Exploded by Bombs Everyday Thirteen Times A day Forever for your trauma to be valid lmao
(Tl;dr this is true and you don’t even have to have The One Big Trauma (or be in the military jfc) to be affected.) Additionally, Complex PTSD (C-PTSD) is a specific variant concerning experiences of no single/major/identifiable trauma event. The symptoms are very similar but vary in a handful of ways. A long period of poverty, a tumultuous childhood, an onslaught of microaggressions – all manner of things like this can lead to stress/trauma/personality disorders over time. Gaslighting and emotional abuse in general are good examples of how this works because we all agree that these are traumatic things, but they aren’t composed of significant traumatic events, they’re a collection of little instances of minor violence that the victim may not have even recognized at the time.
Father and son have the most precious conversation about paris attacks (le petit journal)
- Sensitivity to emotional attack. I use this term to cover people who sense our vulnerability and exploit it by directing violent emotional outbursts at us or threatening us with fits of emotion to get their way. It is the equivalent to using a bullhorn to accost someone with very sensitive hearing.
- Increased drug and alcohol abuse. Many empaths, often those who are unaware of their status, will use drugs or drink to deaden their sensitivity.
- Restrictions on movement. Many of us cannot bear places which are very crowded such as concerts, festivals or theme parks. Often we cannot bear to be in places where powerful emotions are likely to be present such as funerals or hospitals.
- Distrust. Often we innately distrust certain people who have never done us any harm. Likewise, since empaths can often sense “true intentions” behind a façade others come to view us with a kind of suspicion. It is the “how did they know that” syndrome.
“Ron Weasley’s character is consciously written as somewhat racist. Not as racist as Malfoy, of course - he doesn’t scoff at mudbloods and halfbloods, and he doesn’t see himself as superior at all. Still, he unquestionably accepts the inferior position of house elves (they love serving), when he finds out that Lupin’s werewolf his reaction is not only scared but also disgusted (Don’t touch me!) and he is clearly very uncomfortable finding out that Hagrid is half-giant (giants are wild and savage).
And this is brilliant. Because it demonstrates that racism isn’t only present in clearly malicious and evil people, in the Malfoys and Blacks - it’s also there in warm, kind, funny people who just happened to learn some pretty toxic things growing up in a pretty toxic society. And they can unlearn them too, with some time and effort. Ron eventually accepts Hagrid’s parentage, lets Lupin bandage his leg and in the final battle, he worries about the safety of the house elves.
Some people are prejudiced because they are evil, and some people are prejudiced because they don’t know better yet. And those people can learn better, and become better people. And that’s an important lesson. The lesson taught about discrimination shouldn’t be “only evil people do it”, because then all readers will assume it doesn’t apply to them. Instead old JK teaches us “you too are probably doing it, and you should do stop ASAP”.”
damned if i do.: Ron is racist - and that’s great (via cutechesters)
Father and son have the most precious conversation about paris attacks (le petit journal)
Nevertheless, the maladaptive perfectionist shares many features in common with the adaptive perfectionist. Similar to the adaptive perfectionist, the maladaptive perfectionist is likely to be intelligent and articulate. He or she has very high standards and feels passionately about the importance of hard work. Yet in contrast to the adaptive perfectionist, the maladaptive perfectionist often misses deadlines and fails to deliver an exceptional work product (or, in some cases, any work at all). He or she might even be considered lazy or irresponsible by others. However, the maladaptive perfectionist is usually far from lazy; despite a lack of tangible output, he or she often spends an overabundance of time and effort working.
How is this possible? The maladaptive perfectionist often gets stuck in repeating tasks and has difficulty finishing projects. He or she may repeatedly recheck or revise their work. However, despite these efforts, the product never quite feels “good enough.” The ideas are nearly there, but they never feel fleshed out or polished in a way that gives the individual enough internal satisfaction to achieve closure and bring the project to completion. Alternatively, the person may suffer from intellectual paralysis due to an over-concern with living up to their own potential, fear of failure, or a fear of disappointing others (e.g., teachers, parents, loved ones). This intellectual paralysis may lead to complete avoidance, and this avoidance often becomes chronic and difficult to change.
Branding for an audio equipment shop, designed by Paris-based Chateau Batard
Are You Dissociating?
Dissociating is one of the most common responses to abuse and trauma. It involves feeling numb, detached or unreal and (while it happens to everyone once in a while) is experienced more frequently and severely in survivors. Dissociating people vary widely in symptoms and may experience any or all of the things from the following list.
You may be dissociating if you:
- find yourself staring at one spot, not thinking anything
- feel completely numb
- feel like you’re not really in your body, like you’re watching yourself in a movie.
- feel suddenly lightheaded or dizzy
- lose the plot of the show or conversation you were focused on
- feel as if you’re not quite real, like you’re in a dream
- feel like you’re floating
- suddenly feel like you’re not a part of the world around you
- feel detached and far away from other people, who may seem mechanical or unreal to you
- are very startled when someone/something gets your attention
- completely forget what you were thinking just a moment ago
- suddenly cover your face or react as if you’re about to be hurt for no reason
- can’t remember important information about yourself, like your age or where you live
- find yourself rocking back and forth
- become very focused on a small or trivial object or event
- find that voices, sounds or writing seem far away and you sometimes have trouble understanding them.
- feel as if you’ve just experienced a flashback (perhaps rapidly) but you can’t remember anything about it.
- perceive your body as foreign or not belonging to you
(likes and reblogs always taken as support)